Skip to main content

Busy

So far the strangest thing about not having a job is how busy I feel.  I feel busy every day, just as busy if not busier than when I had a job.  What the freak is that all about?  It is like time is compressing in on itself and I'm left to wonder both where the time went and how can I do a better job of it not going there so quickly.

Granted, some time is just wasted.  After writing in the morning, I always take a lunch break.  And it's very easy for the lunch break to become an early afternoon break.  I follow far too many shows on Hulu currently (I don't have a TV, but I do have a laptop).  But, if I'm being honest, I also spent a decent amount of time futzing on the internet when I had a job.  You can use the internet fairly efficiently if you are fitting it in between meetings, or while on hold, or in those twenty minutes before the work day ends and you realize you don't have time to start anything new.  But when you aren't using the internet to self-medicate, it's kind of less fun.  It feels like an interruption.  So, other than Hulu (I just have to see how Revenge ends!), I don't feel like I misuse internet time.

One of the places the time is going is to sleep.  I cannot describe how much I enjoy feeling well-rested.  I don't sleep more than I need to, but I do get enough sleep on a super-consistent basis, something that hasn't happened since...childhood?  Being well-rested makes me seventeen kinds of happy.

I spent a lot of time at work thinking about how unhappy work made me.  A lot of time.  Now that I don't have to think those thoughts, I kind of expected more mental space.  And it's there, but not as much as I'd like it to be.  I'm clearly not using my mind as I could.

This is not an interesting rant.  I feel satisfied with my morning writing schedule and I have a good mix of friends, literary, volunteering and the like in the evenings, it's just these damn afternoons I haven't figured out.  I'm afraid it all comes down to giving up Hulu.  Just as soooooon as I find out how this season of Revenge ends.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

My Litquake 2012 Report

I've been avoiding putting this together, because a part of me really doesn't want this year's Litquake festival to be over already.  The other part of me is still cranky-tired, wandering around trying to get to all those projects I said I'd get to after Litquake, and feeling post-Christmas like. In short, this year's Litquake was AMAZING.  Every year has been awesome, but this one was particularly special for me because I got to actually help plan the awesome.  As a volunteer during the festival for the past several years, I definitely felt like I contributed to making each event I helped at awesome, but this year, being on the committee,* I got to witness the tremendous build up to the festival that happens the whole year prior.  The amount of love, sweat and time that goes into it is incredible, and I'm not sure I've ever been part of something so cool.  Which is not to say I'm not still cranky-tired and looking forward to feeling fully recovered.

Writing Exercise #2 for Setting as Character

Today I tromped all over San Francisco to collect sensory details, photos (and a snack or two) from each of the neighborhoods that my novel's characters live in.  Now, they are not real people, but they do live in a real city, so the fun of it all is finding little details that I would never have noticed before because I'm trying to look for them through my character's eyes.  I discovered a few inconsistencies that I'll need to go back and fix (silly things like the wrong bus line, or the fact that type of architecture doesn't appear in that 'hood), and found a few details I will want to pepper the text with.  Mostly, I just had a really fun time walking all over the city (I clocked 6.5 miles of walking!), and BONUS, the water in my apartment was shut off for the day so it really was the perfect excuse to get the heck out.  Oh, and the weather was about as gorgeous as could possibly be.  Okay, now I'm just annoying myself with my own happiness.  Here are som

What To Expect When You Are Expecting A Pandemic

“When I think about all that has to transpire to get from pregnancy to the birth, I am overwhelmed by time and the unknown. It’s not useful to contemplate. There is only today, and it is good.” I documented my move from ambivalence about parenting, to IVF, to motherhood, as well as all of Year One. I did it longhand because that’s what I did back then. So now, finally, I’m typing all those pages up, in part because of the great What If that living amid a pandemic creates. And I came across this yesterday and it is so true for the current moment, for this, the fifth week of Sheltering in Place. Ways this time is like pregnancy: It can make you fat. It will definitely make you crave near-constant meals and snacks. You will swing from feeling good to anxiety-laden, angry, irritable and back again several times a day. You will want to know how this will all unfold, how hard it will get, exactly how you and your life will be changed. You can’t know any of that. Ther